there is a light

Physically and emotionally just really quite exhausted.

But there is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain.

All will be restored.

All sufficient sacrifice
So freely given
Such a price
Our redemption
Heaven’s gates swing wide.

Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things — and the things that are not — to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before Him. 

It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God — that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”

1 Corinthians 1:26-31

Humbly I come, speak into the depths of my heart and guide my thoughts and words. Lift up my spirits and refresh my soul.

Oh, increase as I decrease.

Can you imagine (pun intented), a whole academic year has passed already? Can you fathom that? Wow this year has passed really fast. It’s been slow and beautiful and frustratingly difficult at times, but it’s incredible how much has happened this year.

I don’t even know where or how to begin

• Currently listening to imagine dragons - it’s time through a link khang posted. throwback to before uni started and deciding on nus.
• This afternoon i chanced across that screen shot i uploaded of rejecting all my UK places and proceeded to reread the entire FK84 course outline and thought to myself how interesting but perhaps shallow and irrelevant all this content would be
• Tonight was also the last night of reading room fellowship for the semester. Photoboothed with Abi and Libo for a bit after dinner with the rest at bukit timah and our mini urban hike hehe. After seeing Abi off (half heart!), Boon Libo and myself sat around doing our own things with worship songs playing in the background.
  I love Your presence, and I love how much I feel it in this place. Because it reminds me that I’m in the right place for now, as I learn and slowly figure things out
• http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/why-wont-god-hurry
  ^ VERY apt. now read, reader!
• I’m unlearning improper worship,
• I’m learning dependence on God,
• I’m needed to help others grow right now,
• and I’m not ready for the size of what I’ll receive.
  
  
  
• Mogo got accepted into YNC and screenshotted me a bunch of their facebookgroup posts. And what can I say ): what they have going on there is all I envisioned and what I expected university to be like. That, that- university community with the whole “this is a new stage of our lives and we’re growing and we have potential to change the world and we have hope and ideas and intelligence and opportunities and we’re gonna have interesting conversations and meaningful interactions with EVERYONE everywhere we go” that glimmers of, snippets of, every once in a long while I feel at NUS.
• and while ge2101 has forever changed my life i shall be reflexive and think about my positionality and add a disclaimer here that I’m PMSing! haha. perhaps that’s why i’m more emotional but nevertheless this is how I feel.
  
  

Still, there’s no rush. this is my NS season, I’ve got another (self-decided) year to figure out my major, and many many years ahead to go and grow.

The Hurry and The Harm

No hurry here.

“To me, I suppose, I see relationships as another way of experiencing and drawing closer to God. A new revelation of His love for us.” -H.

Sic Transit Gloria Mundi, but no. This fellowship is eternal.

ATSL

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& on another (same same but different) note,

this realisation:

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42-47

That’s right. Exactly this.

tive.

Boon Pin uses this phrase a lot - “time spent doing something is time not spent doing another thing”

It got me thinking about opportunity costs, and how sometimes it’s frustrating doing things that feel like a waste of time.

But life has become very different with this new understanding I’ve found:

• If you take admin tasks, meetings, seemingly sian-menial-time-wasting things and instead tackle them with the perspective in mind that you are in fact blessing others/ being a blessing to others
  
  
• Take catching up with your friends, an overly long lunch, spending time with your friends as a time of fellowship
  
  
• Studying (and taking a very long time to understand like about how cells respire) as learning more about God’s creation and worshiping and praising Him through this new understanding of your knowledge of how complex the world is

You start to really find joy in what you’re doing

Live with Christ in mind.

Through my actions, and the things I say, I hope to be witnessing to my pre-believing friends. Through my actions, and the things I say, I’ve been intentionally witnessing to a few specific friends. I have some friends to whom which I understand the reasons why they can’t make that step to cross over to believing. And knowing (at least I’m pretty sure I know) what’s preventing them from coming to Christ, but not being able to speak the right words, or explain clearly enough, or help bridge that divide is frustrating.

But I was reminded by Libo and Stella’s status update that it’s not us. We’re not the ones who will ultimately be able to convince. We can try to, we are the samples at NTUC (Jono, 2013) #last-warning-self, we are part of the process, but only Christ can compel. It is ultimately God who will change hearts, break hearts, open hearts.

“What can we do to convince? Surely only the spirit of God has the power to overcome the uncertainty constrains of the human mind and bring about conviction. We who have found Him to be true can only do what was most honorably tasked to us: to love.

It is our greatest hope that through this we might compel others to find a resolve from this reality- where they truly seek, they will definitely find.”